Trust

I want certain things for my family.  I pray for them, praise God for all we do have and plead at times for things to turn out the way I think they should.  I do believe God is in control and things work out the way they should for a reason, even if I don’t agree with or understand it.  But to truly believe God is in control…deep down…is a difficult thing for me.  Especially when I think something should happen for someone I love. I reason with God, that “if you just do this, we will see You so much more in our lives.” But that is not truly trusting God to work his plan; my wants are not a bargaining chip for faith.  I am not sure why I wrote this? Maybe a simple visual reminder to myself of the battle going on in my brain right now.