One of my very dear friends just moved away… for good. We have known each other for about 7 years and we have become very good friends in the last few years. I have never really had a friend move away, even as a kid. I grew up in one house, in one town. And, most of my friends did too. In college you expect people to go their own direction and “leave” after school, either to return to their home towns or take a job somewhere else. My best friend from college went on to graduate school while I got a job. We are still in touch (she is even coming to visit this summer!) but we have never really lived near each other (unless you count our dorm rooms). So this is really the first time someone I am close to has left.
It is strange. I am excited for my friend's new adventure and what it means for her family and her personally. But honestly, I am nervous and sad. Nervous that our GNO group will fall apart… that I will not continue to challenge myself to grow in my faith… that I won’t have someone to give me an honest perspective on Little Man and his challenges… that I won’t be connected as much… that I won’t have someone who wants to get together with me and my kids. And I am sad that she will not be in my life on a regular, personal basis. She is a Facebook friend, but it is just not the same.
I know I am responsible for my own growth and for making and keeping friends. But my friend is really good about finding something for me to step up to (reading the bible in a year, memorizing verses, reading, having a conversation on a deeper level than just “kid talk,” etc.). Something of these things I would never do on my own. My friend steps out to make play dates and initiates getting together with people. She is the first one to call (or text actually!). I love doing those things, but I do not take the initiative. I guess I make the assumption the other person does not really want to get together and is just being nice or they are too busy with their own lives. I am afraid with my friend not prompting me, I will shrink back into my little world because I am not stepping out. And I am a little angry at myself for not taking her example and being more responsible for my own connections to people and growth.
So, I am going to honor my friend:
I will be the person who initiates things.
I will be the person to read for the pure pleasure of reading, despite the distractions of life.
I will be the person to get involved in things that mean something to me on-my-own, without being asked.
I will be the person to keep our GNO group organized.
I will be the person to organize the book club several of us have talked about.
I will be the person who, in the heat of the moment with Little Man, will remember my friend’s words.
I will do these things, not because she wants me to.
I will do these things because she helped me discover that I want these things.
So my friend, cheers to your next chapter. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for you.
friend, faith builder, reality check and tequila shots
You mean the world to me.