Day 26: YoYo Dinners. YoYo stands for "You are On Your Own" for dinner. Everyone knows they can eat what they can find (within reason) and I am off the hook for making dinner.
Day 27: Lizard started basketball and her practice is inside! Hallelujah. I was able to read my book and watch her practice in realtive warmth. I am also thankful she loves basketball.
Day 28: Laying by the fireplace in the evenings.
Day 29: For the multiple kisses and hugs Little Man gives me each morning at school. Once I say "last one" so he knows it is time for me to go, I get five hugs and five kisses (on the lips!) from him and give him a "fake hug" in the air as I walk out of eye site. I have to walk him to his classroom door everyday. It would so much easier to drop him off in the car line (especially on cold, rainy days like today), but I know the time will end very soon that he will not hug and kiss me that way so I am very thankful.
Showing posts with label Lizard. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lizard. Show all posts
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Monday, November 19, 2012
Thankful: Day 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 & 19
Day 14: My healthy children.
Day 15: A brisk walk with a friend and our puppies.
Day 16: Saying yes at the last minute to arranging a sleepover at our house for Lizard. Sleepovers (and playdates) are not easy for us because of Little Man; it is not a relaxing break for us as it is for most parents when their kids are occupied with their friend. It is MORE work for us. So we don't do them a lot at our house. But it made her smile and for that I am thankful.
Day 17: Heated leather seats. God bless whoever created this feature.
Day 18: A break from soccer for both Soccer Girl and Chief (from coaching). It will be nice to have our activity scheduled lightened significantly.... at least for a few weeks.
Day 19: Little Man and the silly way he says things. He was telling me the time on my digital clock and he said "6-4-E" (cause you know the digital 3 looks like and E!). And he said he can't wait to get his Adams Apple so he can match Dad, except for his face. He also calls Mint Milano cookies (yum) "Limp Pilanos" and remote control cars "Mote Cin-Can-Troll."
Day 15: A brisk walk with a friend and our puppies.
Day 16: Saying yes at the last minute to arranging a sleepover at our house for Lizard. Sleepovers (and playdates) are not easy for us because of Little Man; it is not a relaxing break for us as it is for most parents when their kids are occupied with their friend. It is MORE work for us. So we don't do them a lot at our house. But it made her smile and for that I am thankful.
Day 17: Heated leather seats. God bless whoever created this feature.
Day 18: A break from soccer for both Soccer Girl and Chief (from coaching). It will be nice to have our activity scheduled lightened significantly.... at least for a few weeks.
Day 19: Little Man and the silly way he says things. He was telling me the time on my digital clock and he said "6-4-E" (cause you know the digital 3 looks like and E!). And he said he can't wait to get his Adams Apple so he can match Dad, except for his face. He also calls Mint Milano cookies (yum) "Limp Pilanos" and remote control cars "Mote Cin-Can-Troll."
Monday, January 9, 2012
Time Does Fly!
Well, that was an unplanned break! I can not believe over a month has gone since I last posted. Honestly, I had lots of thoughts to write down last month. I think I even sat down a few times to start a post and then got pulled away for some reason. But, time does fly, especially when you are not looking...
So I am going to resort to a good old bullet type list to catch this blog up to date:
1. I am back to working one morning a week. My "free" time without kids last month was taken up with Christmas stuff - gift buying, trip planning and other such stuff. It has been a very good thing to be home more again. I think everyone is happier (except maybe the bank account). I feel more like myself again.
Now that the New Year is here, I am trying to get a groove going. I don't want to waste time. I want to be intentional. I need to focus on adding some more work to my schedule (consulting and/or some other avenue), but I am looking for a flexible from home set up. Our family needs me home. That is one thing I know.
2. We spent Christmas in Sunriver - just the five of us. It was heaven! We love our extended families to death. We all get along, don't fight or have much underlying tension I hear some families have. We have a good time playing games, eating and all that fun stuff. But we have either hosted family or traveled (and all the house hopping that entails) every Christmas our ENTIRE marriage. We have never had Christmas morning with just us. It was waaaayyyy overdue.
We ate easy meals, I read a whole book in three days, the kids ran around and did what they wanted without too much correction from us to settle down, we went on bike rides, walks (hmmm, yah… there was NO snow!!! I am still ticked about that), went in the hot tub and just enjoyed being together with no schedule or food to have done at a certain time. It was a much needed refresher for our family.
3. Lizard is starting speech intervention at school this week. The crazy kid sounds like she is from Boston. She was in early intervention for speech articulation in preschool. When she was tested in Kindergarten, she did not "qualify" for intervention. We have however, been watching her "R" sounds for quite awhile and while they were better in Kindergarten, they have slowly gotten worse over the years. She is excited about fixing her sound. Poor thing was upset about getting assigned the number "four" jersey in basketball. She was upset that she would have tell people she was "four" and not be able to say it right because of her "R" sound.
4. Soccer Girl is doing great in school. She made honor roll! Oh my... The middle school drama. She is not actually "in" the drama, but is having a great time telling me all about it… who likes who, who does what, who has changed, who she thinks is headed for trouble and all that. She said to me after her first day back at school from break, "Mom, big news at school. So and So (name removed to protect the innocent) got her eyebrows fixed." Oh my, to be twelve! She has been very open with us about the one boy (who she has know since Kindergarten) who likes her. He is a good kid and very nice so I am not too worried… at least so far.
It is interesting how the boy thing works now days. Texting has added a whole new level of communication between young kids. When I was twelve, a boy had to get up the nerve and call you. Now, they can just text you… at 10 o'clock at night. Heaven help us!
5. Little Man. While there are times I could just eat him because he is so sweet and kind, there are other times, I could ring his neck. We met with his teacher in December and received some sobering information, not surprising... but sobering nonetheless. And, we have begun working with a psychologist. She has diagnosed him with ADHD - hyperactive/impulsive. We are not surprised since we have had so many issues for so long, but we don't believe it to some extent because the questionnaires we completed are just a snap shot in time. And he does not "look" like the typical ADHD kid who hangs from the rafters. But, any "diagnosis" for your child is hard to accept, I guess. So we are starting our journey… I will obviously post more as we learn more and work out a plan.
6. I turned 44. Neat.
That, I think, are the highlights of the last month. I am glad to ring in a new year with all the possibilities.
So I am going to resort to a good old bullet type list to catch this blog up to date:
1. I am back to working one morning a week. My "free" time without kids last month was taken up with Christmas stuff - gift buying, trip planning and other such stuff. It has been a very good thing to be home more again. I think everyone is happier (except maybe the bank account). I feel more like myself again.
Now that the New Year is here, I am trying to get a groove going. I don't want to waste time. I want to be intentional. I need to focus on adding some more work to my schedule (consulting and/or some other avenue), but I am looking for a flexible from home set up. Our family needs me home. That is one thing I know.
2. We spent Christmas in Sunriver - just the five of us. It was heaven! We love our extended families to death. We all get along, don't fight or have much underlying tension I hear some families have. We have a good time playing games, eating and all that fun stuff. But we have either hosted family or traveled (and all the house hopping that entails) every Christmas our ENTIRE marriage. We have never had Christmas morning with just us. It was waaaayyyy overdue.
We ate easy meals, I read a whole book in three days, the kids ran around and did what they wanted without too much correction from us to settle down, we went on bike rides, walks (hmmm, yah… there was NO snow!!! I am still ticked about that), went in the hot tub and just enjoyed being together with no schedule or food to have done at a certain time. It was a much needed refresher for our family.
3. Lizard is starting speech intervention at school this week. The crazy kid sounds like she is from Boston. She was in early intervention for speech articulation in preschool. When she was tested in Kindergarten, she did not "qualify" for intervention. We have however, been watching her "R" sounds for quite awhile and while they were better in Kindergarten, they have slowly gotten worse over the years. She is excited about fixing her sound. Poor thing was upset about getting assigned the number "four" jersey in basketball. She was upset that she would have tell people she was "four" and not be able to say it right because of her "R" sound.
4. Soccer Girl is doing great in school. She made honor roll! Oh my... The middle school drama. She is not actually "in" the drama, but is having a great time telling me all about it… who likes who, who does what, who has changed, who she thinks is headed for trouble and all that. She said to me after her first day back at school from break, "Mom, big news at school. So and So (name removed to protect the innocent) got her eyebrows fixed." Oh my, to be twelve! She has been very open with us about the one boy (who she has know since Kindergarten) who likes her. He is a good kid and very nice so I am not too worried… at least so far.
It is interesting how the boy thing works now days. Texting has added a whole new level of communication between young kids. When I was twelve, a boy had to get up the nerve and call you. Now, they can just text you… at 10 o'clock at night. Heaven help us!
5. Little Man. While there are times I could just eat him because he is so sweet and kind, there are other times, I could ring his neck. We met with his teacher in December and received some sobering information, not surprising... but sobering nonetheless. And, we have begun working with a psychologist. She has diagnosed him with ADHD - hyperactive/impulsive. We are not surprised since we have had so many issues for so long, but we don't believe it to some extent because the questionnaires we completed are just a snap shot in time. And he does not "look" like the typical ADHD kid who hangs from the rafters. But, any "diagnosis" for your child is hard to accept, I guess. So we are starting our journey… I will obviously post more as we learn more and work out a plan.
6. I turned 44. Neat.
That, I think, are the highlights of the last month. I am glad to ring in a new year with all the possibilities.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Thankful: Day 18, 19, 20, 21, 22
Day 18 - traveling with good friends to see another good friend. So nice to spend time talking with adults and catching up. And, a delicious dinner.
Day 19 - watching the 4th Twilight movie during the day and shopping and eating out… all without interruptions, refereeing, or yelling.
Day 20 - see Chief after a few days away. I love that man.
Day 21 - watching Lizard practice basketball. Although she is tiny, she is quick and is learning a lot.
Day 22 - becoming a mom 12 years ago today.
Day 19 - watching the 4th Twilight movie during the day and shopping and eating out… all without interruptions, refereeing, or yelling.
Day 20 - see Chief after a few days away. I love that man.
Day 21 - watching Lizard practice basketball. Although she is tiny, she is quick and is learning a lot.
Day 22 - becoming a mom 12 years ago today.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Thankful: Day 1 & 2
I have noticed on Facebook and the blog world the challenge to post one thing you are thankful for each day in November. I like that. I am going to post my "30 days of thankfuls" here on my blog. Maybe a few at a time, but 30 days of what I am grateful for… what makes me smile.
A dear friend of mine gave me Ann Voskamp's book One Thousand Gifts. It is a thought provoking book about finding thankfulness in your day to day life; in the daily grind of a messy kitchen and arguments over homework. If you have not read it, I would highly recommend it.
Day 1 - my three children.
Day 2 - hearing rain pour down while I am inside my warm house.
A dear friend of mine gave me Ann Voskamp's book One Thousand Gifts. It is a thought provoking book about finding thankfulness in your day to day life; in the daily grind of a messy kitchen and arguments over homework. If you have not read it, I would highly recommend it.
Day 1 - my three children.
Day 2 - hearing rain pour down while I am inside my warm house.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Back to School
Well, the kids have been back to school for a month and I am just getting around to this post. Yah. Ahh… it has been hectic to say the least.
Little Man is in 4's preschool at the same school and class. So his "back to school" was pretty uneventful. He has the same teachers he has had since last June. There are a group of new kids and he has done fairly well adjusting. He has good days and bad days. He has a really hard sharing his "show and share" toy so recently he has been "banned" from participating for awhile until he can demonstrate he can share. We will give a whirl in a few weeks.
We are still tackling his behavior issues going through good patches and rough ones. I texted a friend last week that we have been firmly in Holland for several days. It is hard to admit but I always dread walking into his school because I do not know how the day has gone. I breath a sigh of relief when I round the first corner and can see that Little Man is not in the director's office. Then I take a deep breath of relief if I do not have to sign an incident report. I did not really realize I felt that way until recently. It has been happening for a long time, but I did not recognize my thoughts where consistent each time I pulled up. Sad but true.
I am a work in progress. I fail miserably embracing all that makes up my Little Man. It pains me that I struggle with him in public. That pain makes me alter my plans so I do not have to deal with the frustration I feel and looks I receive. Some days I can embrace his challenges and hold my head high. Other days, I can not. A work in progress… still.
Lizard is in third grade. She is with two of her best buddies and loves her teacher. She has slide into the school year with almost no hiccups. And, what I love best about this year, is that I altered my morning schedule so I can take her to school. She and I drop off Little Man at preschool and then I drive her to school. We usually have about 10 minutes until she can go into school. So we wait in the car… just the two of us. Sometime we talk about serious stuff and other times we just kid around. I love it.
She is cheer leading at the football games. She loves it and maybe has finally found her thing. She is taking it seriously and we all have the cheers stuck in our head from her practicing at home. "Go Knights!" She is also signed up for basketball in the winter… all 45 pounds of her!
Soccer Girl is in 6th grade - a middle schooler! She really was not too nervous before school started, just wondering about the volume of homework in store for her. On the first day, I took the morning off and drove her to school. When I told her it was time to go, she said a very nervous "oh man" and looked at me with pleading eyes. But my big girl gathered up her stuff and took a deep breath, gave me a kiss and got out of the car. She walked with her head high into the school.
She has adjusted very well. I think the biggest adjustment has been the social activity… all the who likes who, who is mad at who now stuff. She has stayed away from it, but seems to like to be in the know. Luckily she will tell me who likes her, what so and so did or said. I pray that communication continues as the years pass.
So overall the start of the school year has been good. Just busy. I have an hour with Little Man before Lizard gets home, then an hour with the two of them before Soccer Girl arrives. Then typically we need to be at some activity within the next hour. It makes for very hectic weeks. Lots of quick dinners and not much down time. Our little family needs down time so we are trying to work that in and say no when we need to to get it. Like the other night, I had plans to go out to dinner with two good friends. It was a rough day - everyone yelling and fighting - so I bowed out of the dinner at the last minute and stayed with my family. It was the right thing to do.
Little Man is in 4's preschool at the same school and class. So his "back to school" was pretty uneventful. He has the same teachers he has had since last June. There are a group of new kids and he has done fairly well adjusting. He has good days and bad days. He has a really hard sharing his "show and share" toy so recently he has been "banned" from participating for awhile until he can demonstrate he can share. We will give a whirl in a few weeks.
We are still tackling his behavior issues going through good patches and rough ones. I texted a friend last week that we have been firmly in Holland for several days. It is hard to admit but I always dread walking into his school because I do not know how the day has gone. I breath a sigh of relief when I round the first corner and can see that Little Man is not in the director's office. Then I take a deep breath of relief if I do not have to sign an incident report. I did not really realize I felt that way until recently. It has been happening for a long time, but I did not recognize my thoughts where consistent each time I pulled up. Sad but true.
I am a work in progress. I fail miserably embracing all that makes up my Little Man. It pains me that I struggle with him in public. That pain makes me alter my plans so I do not have to deal with the frustration I feel and looks I receive. Some days I can embrace his challenges and hold my head high. Other days, I can not. A work in progress… still.
Lizard is in third grade. She is with two of her best buddies and loves her teacher. She has slide into the school year with almost no hiccups. And, what I love best about this year, is that I altered my morning schedule so I can take her to school. She and I drop off Little Man at preschool and then I drive her to school. We usually have about 10 minutes until she can go into school. So we wait in the car… just the two of us. Sometime we talk about serious stuff and other times we just kid around. I love it.
She is cheer leading at the football games. She loves it and maybe has finally found her thing. She is taking it seriously and we all have the cheers stuck in our head from her practicing at home. "Go Knights!" She is also signed up for basketball in the winter… all 45 pounds of her!
Soccer Girl is in 6th grade - a middle schooler! She really was not too nervous before school started, just wondering about the volume of homework in store for her. On the first day, I took the morning off and drove her to school. When I told her it was time to go, she said a very nervous "oh man" and looked at me with pleading eyes. But my big girl gathered up her stuff and took a deep breath, gave me a kiss and got out of the car. She walked with her head high into the school.
She has adjusted very well. I think the biggest adjustment has been the social activity… all the who likes who, who is mad at who now stuff. She has stayed away from it, but seems to like to be in the know. Luckily she will tell me who likes her, what so and so did or said. I pray that communication continues as the years pass.
So overall the start of the school year has been good. Just busy. I have an hour with Little Man before Lizard gets home, then an hour with the two of them before Soccer Girl arrives. Then typically we need to be at some activity within the next hour. It makes for very hectic weeks. Lots of quick dinners and not much down time. Our little family needs down time so we are trying to work that in and say no when we need to to get it. Like the other night, I had plans to go out to dinner with two good friends. It was a rough day - everyone yelling and fighting - so I bowed out of the dinner at the last minute and stayed with my family. It was the right thing to do.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Ranch Quesadillas
Here is a quick and tasty dinner idea. Lizard and I were watching food tv and Melissa d’Arabian’s Ten Dollar Dinners (Lizard loves to cook and this lady has great, easy ideas!). A commercial of sorts came on with D’Arabian featuring Hidden Valley Ranch salad dressing ideas. Lizard and I saw this and both thought yum. And we tried it a few days later and yum is right!
Ranch Quesadillas
Flour or corn tortillas
Grated cheese of choice
Ranch salad dressing
Cooked chicken, diced
Veggies diced/grated (spinach, zucchini, corn, carrots… whatever you have on hand)
Mix the ranch dressing with the grated cheese being careful not to add too much dressing. Spread some of the cheese mixture on a tortilla. Add chicken and veggies. Top with another tortilla. Brown in skillet, flipping once, until cheese is melted and veggies and chicken are heated through. Remove from pan and cut into wedges. Yum!
Friday, May 13, 2011
God's Hands
We are in a very rough stretch with Little Man. Very rough. We had a good stretch for awhile, but the last few months have been deteriorating and the last few weeks have been bad. We are truly at a loss how to parent him through this. Calls are being made and a plan of attack is underway. We can not continue this way. I can not. He can not. It is affecting him deeply - you can see it in his eyes. It is impacting our family. I am pissed, sad, exhausted, frustrated and feel guilty most of the time. That is no way to live. I can only imagine the emotions he is feeling.
He and I said prayers last night and asked God to help him make good decisions. We talked about when he gets mad at school or home to close his eyes and ask God to help him. And this morning when I asked him what he could do when he gets mad, he said “pray to God.” We said another prayer this morning while he was eating breakfast. And guess what? Little Man had a better morning today. He only had a few minor blow ups and only punched Lizard a few times, but he was able to get himself under control. And he did not argue about the toys I said he could not take to school. He got himself in the car and was generally happy.
For some reason we were downstairs early this morning so we had extra time. I even commented to the girls – why are we all so early this morning? On the way to drop Little Man off at school, my neighbor texted me saying she was going to request that Lizard and her daughter be placed together next year and asked if that was ok? I texted her back and said I wanted to do the same thing. Well guess what? The form was due today and I had no idea… I knew it was coming up and had thought about requesting that the girls be together. But not being in the school very much now that I am working more, I am out of the loop and miss stuff. Her text came at just the right time. Since we were early this morning, I had time to go to the school, find the form, get it turned in and still got to work on time.
Ok, how can I not think God had His hands in the events of this morning? We truly went to Him in prayer last night and He worked things out to take care of our kids today… Little Man with his issues (at least for this morning) and Lizard to help foster her friendship with our neighbor. One that is very good for her.
Now, some might say I am a Jesus freak, but I tell you… I can not miss that things go better when I pray. I found my wedding ring about 1 minute after I FINALLY said a prayer… when I finally prayed about all the mud slinging that recently occurred, I felt better. Things happen and God is beside me when I pray. Pretty hard for anyone to miss that today.
The road with Little Man is going to be long, but at least for a little while today, I could see hope.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
It Has Been Awhile...
I can not believe I have not posted anything since the beginning of September. It has been a crazy few months with lots of changes for us.
The biggest change is that I started another part time job! It was one of the first resumes I sent out and I got the job. It was truly a "careful what you wish for" type of feeling. I can not believe with how many people out there looking for work right now, I got it. I feel very blessed. It is part time Monday-Friday in the mornings only…. I am back home by 1 o'clock. Mondays are long though since I moved my other part time job to the afternoon. And also on Monday I do my third part time job after the kids go to sleep. But overall, I like the people and the job. I am using my brain which is a very good thing. And, it has added a cushion to our budget which was the desired result.
It is funny, the hardest thing I struggled with was having to move Little Man from his preschool to a whole new day care/preschool set up. He did really well with his old preschool teacher despite how much of a challenge he could be. I could have pieced together care for him during the week and keep him there, but he would have had four different care givers during the week. And that would have only been through the end of the year. That was not going to work on many levels, but most importantly, it was not fair to him to shuttle him around so much. So we made the decision to make a complete change.
It has been the best move for him. He LOVES his new preschool and teacher. Just yesterday when I picked him up, we were walking out to the car and he said "I just love this place." Oh Little Man, I do too! While he has had some difficulties, he has not seemed to struggle with behaving like he did at his old preschool. They see how smart he is and what a sense of humor he has. They see him positively, not negatively. I so need to hear that when it comes to my Little Man.
Since I pick him up after all the other kids that are still there have gone down for rest/nap time, he has to sit at a table and quietly play and wait for me. I thought this would be a big negative. But it has turned out to be wonderful for him. He is getting about 30-40 minutes of one on one time with a teacher, sometimes two! He is coloring, practicing his letter and using flash cards.
And, he is at a home daycare on Mondays with a wonderful loving, Christian women from our church. He can snuggle on the couch if he needs too. And, she also does formalized preschool activities with the kids so he is getting five days a week of "education." Fabulous.
The girls are enjoying their new found responsibility of getting themselves to school. They have worked together well and Soccer Girl has really stepped up to look out for Lizard. They have surprised me. They are doing the chores I leave for them and getting their reading done all before school. Yah for responsible children!
It is funny how everything fell into place and the timing of it all. The location, the hours, Little Man's care, the girls stepping up...The answer to prayer is not lost on me.
The other fun thing that has happened is the number of photography jobs I have gotten. I have done five senior portraits sessions in the last three months and have a family session coming up this weekend. I love it! I has been hard to balance the time commitment it takes in editing the photos with all that has been going on. But it really has been fun. I see my photography as a fun creative outlet for me, a much needed service for people looking for good affordable photographs (did you know that senior pictures can cost upwards of a $1000… can you believe someone would pay that and that someone would have the nerve to charge that?!) and something that earns us some extra spending money. A win-win-win!
As I am getting use to the new schedule, I think I will be back to posting more often. I have lots rattling around in my brain that I think needs to be written… thoughts on working more and how that impacts me and how I view myself as a Mom, updates on Little Man, making things a priority that should be…. lots in my brain. I am feeling a little less frazzled so I think I can begin to formulate my thoughts so I can document this time. After all, the name of my blog is "simply capturing life" so I should do that, capture our life.
The biggest change is that I started another part time job! It was one of the first resumes I sent out and I got the job. It was truly a "careful what you wish for" type of feeling. I can not believe with how many people out there looking for work right now, I got it. I feel very blessed. It is part time Monday-Friday in the mornings only…. I am back home by 1 o'clock. Mondays are long though since I moved my other part time job to the afternoon. And also on Monday I do my third part time job after the kids go to sleep. But overall, I like the people and the job. I am using my brain which is a very good thing. And, it has added a cushion to our budget which was the desired result.
It is funny, the hardest thing I struggled with was having to move Little Man from his preschool to a whole new day care/preschool set up. He did really well with his old preschool teacher despite how much of a challenge he could be. I could have pieced together care for him during the week and keep him there, but he would have had four different care givers during the week. And that would have only been through the end of the year. That was not going to work on many levels, but most importantly, it was not fair to him to shuttle him around so much. So we made the decision to make a complete change.
It has been the best move for him. He LOVES his new preschool and teacher. Just yesterday when I picked him up, we were walking out to the car and he said "I just love this place." Oh Little Man, I do too! While he has had some difficulties, he has not seemed to struggle with behaving like he did at his old preschool. They see how smart he is and what a sense of humor he has. They see him positively, not negatively. I so need to hear that when it comes to my Little Man.
Since I pick him up after all the other kids that are still there have gone down for rest/nap time, he has to sit at a table and quietly play and wait for me. I thought this would be a big negative. But it has turned out to be wonderful for him. He is getting about 30-40 minutes of one on one time with a teacher, sometimes two! He is coloring, practicing his letter and using flash cards.
And, he is at a home daycare on Mondays with a wonderful loving, Christian women from our church. He can snuggle on the couch if he needs too. And, she also does formalized preschool activities with the kids so he is getting five days a week of "education." Fabulous.
The girls are enjoying their new found responsibility of getting themselves to school. They have worked together well and Soccer Girl has really stepped up to look out for Lizard. They have surprised me. They are doing the chores I leave for them and getting their reading done all before school. Yah for responsible children!
It is funny how everything fell into place and the timing of it all. The location, the hours, Little Man's care, the girls stepping up...The answer to prayer is not lost on me.
The other fun thing that has happened is the number of photography jobs I have gotten. I have done five senior portraits sessions in the last three months and have a family session coming up this weekend. I love it! I has been hard to balance the time commitment it takes in editing the photos with all that has been going on. But it really has been fun. I see my photography as a fun creative outlet for me, a much needed service for people looking for good affordable photographs (did you know that senior pictures can cost upwards of a $1000… can you believe someone would pay that and that someone would have the nerve to charge that?!) and something that earns us some extra spending money. A win-win-win!
As I am getting use to the new schedule, I think I will be back to posting more often. I have lots rattling around in my brain that I think needs to be written… thoughts on working more and how that impacts me and how I view myself as a Mom, updates on Little Man, making things a priority that should be…. lots in my brain. I am feeling a little less frazzled so I think I can begin to formulate my thoughts so I can document this time. After all, the name of my blog is "simply capturing life" so I should do that, capture our life.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Start of Another School Year
All three kids started school yesterday. Backpacks were ready and lunches made the night before (we have turned their lunch making responsibility over to the girls – yahoo!). Clothes picked out, baths and all were asleep early. We were ready! I took the obligatory photos in the morning on our front porch, in front of the bush with yellow flowers, in front of the hydrangeas, and the stairs with the backpacks. Soccer girl has it down by now, directly the other two where to go next. Little Man cooperated and I got some fun shots of the three of them. Such a great day and a bittersweet one too.
Soccer girl started 5th grade… her last year in elementary school. She seemed very nervous, but excited to start the year. She has always been my worrier and wears her emotions on her sleeve. I hope for a challenging year for her that prepares her for middle school… academically, socially and emotionally. And, I am just saying, but the kids in her class look so big. I swear there was one boy who was a tall as me. I am ready for this, but on the other hand, I am so NOT ready for this.
Lizard started 2nd grade. She was a trooper and eased into her class. She was quiet from nerves, but also very confident. I think Lizard will do well as she leaves the ease of first grade. She is eager to do big girl things and hopefully this will be the year she comes onto her own and matures. She is looking forward to getting homework. Hopefully second grade will meet her expectations.
Little Man started 3’s preschool. He was so excited, wearing his backpack and carrying his lunch box even when walking the girls to their school. He did well and other than telling me he did not want me to go, he seemed to be having fun. I was able to leave and sneak around and watch him. I am curious to see what this year brings for him.
Since I am stealing this from a friend’s facebook post I can not claim any brilliance in writing it, but I think it sums up my wish for my kids this year…
May you find a friend that likes you because you are nice, not because you are cool. May you have a teacher that makes you eager to learn, not just eager to please. May you treat all your peers equal, not just the one’s that you want to impress. May your year be blessed and your memories rich.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
I Want a Cracker!
We are on week two of a gluten and dairy free diet for Little Man and Lizard. We took Little Man for food sensitivity testing and his wheat (whole wheat, spelt and gluten) and dairy (whey and casein) were high. Not off the charts allergic, but high enough to warrant a go at it to see if eliminating gluten and/or dairy would help with his behavior and his eczema. We are also following this for Lizard to see if we can pinpoint the cause of her ongoing stomach aches, which to date we have not been able to figure out.
It has been a challenge for sure. Not insurmountable, but a challenge. And very expensive. We eat an above average diet – not the healthiest out there for sure, but far better than many people. Even with that, it has been interesting to try to come up with alternatives to our normal choices. You can’t just grab a bag of goldfish crackers to fill the kids up. There are gluten/dairy free alternatives, but one box for $4.00 is the size of one snack – for one kid - maybe! Plus it is a challenge to find items the kids will eat. It has been some trial an error but we are making our way.
We started out thinking the whole family would follow it. But due to cost and the impact on our food budget, we are only following it strictly for the two kids. It is maddening that alternative foods… organic…gluten free… or whatever… are so much more expensive. It is actually ridiculous that I just referred to it as “alternative” because the general public should be eating THIS food, not the processed, chemical filled “food” the food industry shoves down our throats through coupons and cheap options. The more I learn, the angrier I get. It cuts to the core when I have to make a food choice based on cost and not on what is the healthiest choice.
In the end, I am not sure eliminating dairy and/or gluten will make much difference for Little Man. I guess I am hopeful that it will have a positive impact in improving his behavior; but skeptical at this point. Maybe I am reaching for something to “blame” for his actions, his defiance and his difficult nature. I know I must explore all the possibilities for my kids to be successful and provide that to the best of my ability. At the same time, it is hard to swallow that Little Man’s behavior might not improve despite our best efforts. I hate that he might be labeled the difficult kid… the trouble maker… the one that the other parents roll their eyes at and talk about. We have already had a small taste of it.
What I want people to see is that he is so full of life, funny and smart. He is amazing. He is athletic, runs faster than any kid I know and has a smile that lights up a room. He says the funniest things (like just the other day telling Soccer Girl, “hey you have polka dots on your face” referring to her freckles, as if she didn’t know!). I think people can see it a lot of the times when there is no structure and he is free to play on his own and on his own terms. But if structure or directions are involved, it is not as visible.
One of the other things Chief and I have talked about is our role as parents in his behavior. There is cause and effect in most things in life… when we react a certain way to Little Man’s behavior it can cause him to react a certain way. We are trying to monitor our reactions. I know there are times when I have escalated his negative behavior due to my reaction. It is funny, people say by waiting to have kids until you are older, you are more mature and can handle the ups and downs better. Maybe so, but I have found I have less patience and am more tired than I was when had my other two and was "younger." My challenge is to be calm, quiet and thoughtful in my responses.
We will keep plugging away at things for our Little Man. He deserve that. I know there is purpose for this struggle even if I can't see it right now.
“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
It has been a challenge for sure. Not insurmountable, but a challenge. And very expensive. We eat an above average diet – not the healthiest out there for sure, but far better than many people. Even with that, it has been interesting to try to come up with alternatives to our normal choices. You can’t just grab a bag of goldfish crackers to fill the kids up. There are gluten/dairy free alternatives, but one box for $4.00 is the size of one snack – for one kid - maybe! Plus it is a challenge to find items the kids will eat. It has been some trial an error but we are making our way.
We started out thinking the whole family would follow it. But due to cost and the impact on our food budget, we are only following it strictly for the two kids. It is maddening that alternative foods… organic…gluten free… or whatever… are so much more expensive. It is actually ridiculous that I just referred to it as “alternative” because the general public should be eating THIS food, not the processed, chemical filled “food” the food industry shoves down our throats through coupons and cheap options. The more I learn, the angrier I get. It cuts to the core when I have to make a food choice based on cost and not on what is the healthiest choice.
In the end, I am not sure eliminating dairy and/or gluten will make much difference for Little Man. I guess I am hopeful that it will have a positive impact in improving his behavior; but skeptical at this point. Maybe I am reaching for something to “blame” for his actions, his defiance and his difficult nature. I know I must explore all the possibilities for my kids to be successful and provide that to the best of my ability. At the same time, it is hard to swallow that Little Man’s behavior might not improve despite our best efforts. I hate that he might be labeled the difficult kid… the trouble maker… the one that the other parents roll their eyes at and talk about. We have already had a small taste of it.
What I want people to see is that he is so full of life, funny and smart. He is amazing. He is athletic, runs faster than any kid I know and has a smile that lights up a room. He says the funniest things (like just the other day telling Soccer Girl, “hey you have polka dots on your face” referring to her freckles, as if she didn’t know!). I think people can see it a lot of the times when there is no structure and he is free to play on his own and on his own terms. But if structure or directions are involved, it is not as visible.
One of the other things Chief and I have talked about is our role as parents in his behavior. There is cause and effect in most things in life… when we react a certain way to Little Man’s behavior it can cause him to react a certain way. We are trying to monitor our reactions. I know there are times when I have escalated his negative behavior due to my reaction. It is funny, people say by waiting to have kids until you are older, you are more mature and can handle the ups and downs better. Maybe so, but I have found I have less patience and am more tired than I was when had my other two and was "younger." My challenge is to be calm, quiet and thoughtful in my responses.
We will keep plugging away at things for our Little Man. He deserve that. I know there is purpose for this struggle even if I can't see it right now.
“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Sunday, August 15, 2010
It is Hard to Grow Up
This summer has been a whirlwind... I am actually not looking forward to school starting... just yet. Usually I am ready for school to be back in session a few weeks after the kids get out, but not this summer. And, I am not sure exactly why.
Maybe I know I will have to be earnest in my job search (although I am coming around to the idea of working more and have put out a few feelers already). Maybe I know now that the grind of making lunches gets old by about day three. Maybe it is because my youngest is starting preschool (how can that be?). Maybe because we have not had as much arguing this summer as last summer (still lots of bickering, but not as much or is it that I am getting immune to it?). I think maybe the main reason is that my oldest is starting her last year of elementary school.
Her little kid days are very numbered and I realize that. The things she wants to do, the discussions she wants to have, the questions she asks are not little kids things any more for the most part. Soccer girl has always been mature for her age and very observant of life and things going on around her. We have even had to have the “birds and the bees talk” with her well over a year ago when she was 9 or so because the subject came up among her friends. Bless Chief’s “Dad of a Daughter” heart when he initially told her to wait and we would talk about it when they saw the “movie” in school. Can’t get away with waiting that long in this day and age. And the wonder of Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy are long out of the bag. Sigh.
The age span between my kids has been very evident this summer. What entertains a 3 year old does not really entertain a 10.5 year old. The most recent example was last week when I told the kids we were meeting friends at the park (where she is the oldest kid in the group), “we are going to a park, really do we have to?” Kids want to play at the park, for pete sakes... right?
It is a struggle to let Soccer Girl do things, while Lizard pouts because she does not get to do all that fun stuff. It is hard for a seven year old to be the one who is told no all the time. Soon her circle will expand, but not soon enough for her.
So I am letting the last few weeks of summer unfold, buying school supplies and a few new clothes. The last few play dates and sleepovers have been scheduled. It is hard for kids to grow up these days, but I think it is even harder for this Mom to let them grow up.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
A Belated Birthday Post!
My Lizard turned seven on June 9th. I have finally had a chance to sit down and put my thoughts about my seven year old on “paper.”
I can not believe how fast the time has gone and that she will be starting second grade in the fall. I am so proud of my girl. She is growing up way too fast (much faster than her big sister did). So many things are a blur and fuzzy in my memory. But when I think of Lizard I think of…
• Her absolutely contagious belly laugh
• Her freckles and especially the one in the middle of her nose
• Her pistol-like personality; happy one minute; foot-stomping mad the next
• How she has excelled in school in all areas
• How much she loves to read and how well she does (she loves those chapter books)
• How much more social she is then we thought she would be given how quiet and shy she was when she was younger
• How she is still finding her voice with her sister and among the kids in the neighborhood
• How she and Soccer Girl sneak into each other’s beds to sleep with each other
• How she is a card shark – really don’t play card games with her; you will lose most of the time!
• How she loves to play school
• How she can needle her brother and sister into a rage almost on a dime
• How hard she is to wake up in the morning (I dread the teenage years!)
• How she is a home body and likes her alone time
• How she gently rubs Little Man’s face during some quiet time (and he loves it too)
She is such a joy and my little peanut (all 40 pounds of her when she is dripping wet!). She loves to help and help cook. I have to remember to let her do it more often; it may be faster to do it myself but what really is the rush? She still loves to play with baby dolls but has outgrown most of her other little toys…sniff. Do seven year-olds these days really not play with many toys any more?
She wants to play basketball. She is fast and can dribble really well considering she has not really played much. Lizard has informed Soccer Girl that not everyone loves soccer and she does not have to play soccer just because her sister does! Go Lizard. It is hard for her to keep up with her sister, but I think she is learning she does not have to and she can make her own choices.
We are so proud of you Lizard. You will do great things…in your own way and in your own time. Happy birthday!
I can not believe how fast the time has gone and that she will be starting second grade in the fall. I am so proud of my girl. She is growing up way too fast (much faster than her big sister did). So many things are a blur and fuzzy in my memory. But when I think of Lizard I think of…
• Her absolutely contagious belly laugh
• Her freckles and especially the one in the middle of her nose
• Her pistol-like personality; happy one minute; foot-stomping mad the next
• How she has excelled in school in all areas
• How much she loves to read and how well she does (she loves those chapter books)
• How much more social she is then we thought she would be given how quiet and shy she was when she was younger
• How she is still finding her voice with her sister and among the kids in the neighborhood
• How she and Soccer Girl sneak into each other’s beds to sleep with each other
• How she is a card shark – really don’t play card games with her; you will lose most of the time!
• How she loves to play school
• How she can needle her brother and sister into a rage almost on a dime
• How hard she is to wake up in the morning (I dread the teenage years!)
• How she is a home body and likes her alone time
• How she gently rubs Little Man’s face during some quiet time (and he loves it too)
She is such a joy and my little peanut (all 40 pounds of her when she is dripping wet!). She loves to help and help cook. I have to remember to let her do it more often; it may be faster to do it myself but what really is the rush? She still loves to play with baby dolls but has outgrown most of her other little toys…sniff. Do seven year-olds these days really not play with many toys any more?
She wants to play basketball. She is fast and can dribble really well considering she has not really played much. Lizard has informed Soccer Girl that not everyone loves soccer and she does not have to play soccer just because her sister does! Go Lizard. It is hard for her to keep up with her sister, but I think she is learning she does not have to and she can make her own choices.
We are so proud of you Lizard. You will do great things…in your own way and in your own time. Happy birthday!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
What is Happening?
My Little Man has been in big boy underwear one week as of tonight! He just kind of started on his own last Tuesday evening and I looked at my schedule and thought let’s go for it. I was able to be home for the most part for 6 days straight before he had to go back to the babysitter today.
He has done so well! I am so proud of him. He still is having some accidents (mostly with the whole poop thing, sigh…). But, for the most part, he is holding it for long stretches of time and gets himself there. Since he is so stubborn, I figured it would take much longer for him to get it. We are not out of the woods for sure, but we are well on our way. Well done, my Big Boy!
I so want him potty trained, but am sad that my diapering days are pretty much behind me. I love the crinkle sound of the diaper when my little ones toddle by and the smell of Desitin, oh man, I love it. I joked with Chief that I might just buy some so I can smell it when I need a baby fix.
The remodel is done… Soccer Girl is in her own room and Lizard has her own room back! Their rooms are painted and they love having their OWN space. They have asked to sleep with each other many more times than I expected already. Maybe somewhere beneath all the bickering, they will truly be friends.
Chief’s new job is going well. He is able to work from home quite a bit which has been great, but also required some adjustment on our part. I think the best part is that he is not being micro-managed and trusted to do his job. I can see his confidence returning and he is so much happier. I am so happy for him.
Summer vacation starts next week. I am looking forward to the more relaxed schedule, but also know that causes trouble for us. I am going to do my best to have a plan each day. We need a focus and activities to keep everyone from getting on each other’s nerves. It will be a challenge to keep all three entertained as what is exciting to a 3 year old is not so much to a 10 year old or even a 7 year old. But, I will do my best.
I am going to start looking for another part time job to hopefully add to or if need be replace my current jobs. We have long wanted some more financial breathing room each month and have finally decided that I need to earn some more income to do that. The trick now is what to look for… I do not want to be tied to a job 9-5, commute and all that – never again! I want to be home when the kids get home, I want to hear about their day first hand, and most important, know the teachers and their friends and their parents, etc. The trick is that I do not know what I want to do so it is hard to even look. I do not want to HR any more. After 20 years, I am done with it. I want something from home ideally that allows me the flexibility to be home when my babies get home.
I am struggling (or probably more accurately dragging my feet) with the idea of working more. I haven’t really pin-pointed why yet. It is not because I don’t want people to know we need more financial flow each month – I could careless about that – I am putting it on the internet for Pete’s sake. I think it is the idea of not being home for my kids and the perception that I have failed them somehow. I really don’t know. I have always worked either part time or full time. I do not have an issue with putting my kids in childcare; I honestly think it is good for them. I also know that I am not the best stay at home mom. I frustrate easily and am bored. How can someone not be good at being with their kids? That could be a big part of it too.
I want so much for us to have some extra to do things (not a lot of extra, just a little bit) – like a vacation, like proper repairs on the house or upgrades. Most of our “vacations” are typically visiting family and while that is wonderful, it does not create family memories for the five of us. It is not an experience that the kids will remember and look back on. While I am not a “keep up with the Jones” type of person, it is hard at times when friends or family are renting houseboats for a week in the summer or re-doing their floors. I am not judging anyone on how or why they spend their money. It would just be nice for us to have the freedom to do some of those things without going into debt to do them and being able to keep my current schedule. I guess it is just hard to swallow that it will not happen.
My struggle continues and my half-hearted search continues…maybe the perfect job will land in my lap tomorrow? I just hope I recognize it when it lands.
So that is the update around here and my record of what is happening at this time for my little family.
He has done so well! I am so proud of him. He still is having some accidents (mostly with the whole poop thing, sigh…). But, for the most part, he is holding it for long stretches of time and gets himself there. Since he is so stubborn, I figured it would take much longer for him to get it. We are not out of the woods for sure, but we are well on our way. Well done, my Big Boy!
I so want him potty trained, but am sad that my diapering days are pretty much behind me. I love the crinkle sound of the diaper when my little ones toddle by and the smell of Desitin, oh man, I love it. I joked with Chief that I might just buy some so I can smell it when I need a baby fix.
The remodel is done… Soccer Girl is in her own room and Lizard has her own room back! Their rooms are painted and they love having their OWN space. They have asked to sleep with each other many more times than I expected already. Maybe somewhere beneath all the bickering, they will truly be friends.
Chief’s new job is going well. He is able to work from home quite a bit which has been great, but also required some adjustment on our part. I think the best part is that he is not being micro-managed and trusted to do his job. I can see his confidence returning and he is so much happier. I am so happy for him.
Summer vacation starts next week. I am looking forward to the more relaxed schedule, but also know that causes trouble for us. I am going to do my best to have a plan each day. We need a focus and activities to keep everyone from getting on each other’s nerves. It will be a challenge to keep all three entertained as what is exciting to a 3 year old is not so much to a 10 year old or even a 7 year old. But, I will do my best.
I am going to start looking for another part time job to hopefully add to or if need be replace my current jobs. We have long wanted some more financial breathing room each month and have finally decided that I need to earn some more income to do that. The trick now is what to look for… I do not want to be tied to a job 9-5, commute and all that – never again! I want to be home when the kids get home, I want to hear about their day first hand, and most important, know the teachers and their friends and their parents, etc. The trick is that I do not know what I want to do so it is hard to even look. I do not want to HR any more. After 20 years, I am done with it. I want something from home ideally that allows me the flexibility to be home when my babies get home.
I am struggling (or probably more accurately dragging my feet) with the idea of working more. I haven’t really pin-pointed why yet. It is not because I don’t want people to know we need more financial flow each month – I could careless about that – I am putting it on the internet for Pete’s sake. I think it is the idea of not being home for my kids and the perception that I have failed them somehow. I really don’t know. I have always worked either part time or full time. I do not have an issue with putting my kids in childcare; I honestly think it is good for them. I also know that I am not the best stay at home mom. I frustrate easily and am bored. How can someone not be good at being with their kids? That could be a big part of it too.
I want so much for us to have some extra to do things (not a lot of extra, just a little bit) – like a vacation, like proper repairs on the house or upgrades. Most of our “vacations” are typically visiting family and while that is wonderful, it does not create family memories for the five of us. It is not an experience that the kids will remember and look back on. While I am not a “keep up with the Jones” type of person, it is hard at times when friends or family are renting houseboats for a week in the summer or re-doing their floors. I am not judging anyone on how or why they spend their money. It would just be nice for us to have the freedom to do some of those things without going into debt to do them and being able to keep my current schedule. I guess it is just hard to swallow that it will not happen.
My struggle continues and my half-hearted search continues…maybe the perfect job will land in my lap tomorrow? I just hope I recognize it when it lands.
So that is the update around here and my record of what is happening at this time for my little family.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
A Tough Long Week
It has been a tough, long week… we have all been sick to varying degrees, I am on general overload and we went out of town for a soccer tournament which added logistical stuff to my plate on top of everything else. I am sitting here now with day three of stomach pains, a week and half of an annoying cough and the general “I feel like crap” feeling… plus my annual exam is today (neat!) and potentially jury duty later this week (even better!). Yes, it has been a tough long week.
I have been doing some research on diet and how it impacts behavior. We have long suspected that food dyes and high fructose corn syrup (and the like) impact Lizard’s behavior and that she may have some level of intolerance. She has vomited with 30 minutes of consuming certain food items. Curiously, it is not every time that she has that food, but it is clearly food related. And Lizard knows… today is “Kool-Aid” day at school (they are counting down the alphabet to the end of school – like Apple day, Ball day, Crayon day, etc.). We have already talked to her teacher about this suspected issue, but Lizard talked to her teacher about not wanting Kool-Aid and she brought her own organic-less-sugar-no food-dye juice. I am very proud of her.
And, after Little Man had his 3-year check up last week, I am wondering how much his diet is impacting his behavior. His doctor suggested some of his behaviors could become worrisome if they are not controlled within the next year. She did not indicate that she thought he might have ADHD or anything like that at this point. And after doing some research, I would be very surprised if that were the outcome (and very sad). But, I am beginning to wonder how much of his behavior is the “boy” in him and how much his behavior would improve with a better diet.
I have had many people…his doctor included…tell me repeatedly that Little Man is more “active” than most children at his age – boy or girl. That is helpful, but I often wonder if it is their polite way of saying “your kid is out of control.” I don’t think so, but in my exasperated state with him many times, I have to wonder. He is defiant, impulsive, destructive, loud and hurtful a lot of the time. On the flip side, he can sit and play cars, likes to look at books and watch a video. So he can settle down. And he is very smart, silly funny and the cutest 3 year old I know. But, my days are mostly filled with refeerring, disciplining and negotiating. Now, most would say that is what you do with a 3 year old. And, yes, I agree; but, not to this degree. I am truly worried about how he will do in preschool this fall.
I want so much for Little Man and all my kids succeed. What parent wants their kid to struggle? I want to make sure we have done everything we can to help ensure they are successful. So my research continues… family decisions regarding food choices and our budget are to be made… So, yes, it has been a long tough week on many fronts.
I have been doing some research on diet and how it impacts behavior. We have long suspected that food dyes and high fructose corn syrup (and the like) impact Lizard’s behavior and that she may have some level of intolerance. She has vomited with 30 minutes of consuming certain food items. Curiously, it is not every time that she has that food, but it is clearly food related. And Lizard knows… today is “Kool-Aid” day at school (they are counting down the alphabet to the end of school – like Apple day, Ball day, Crayon day, etc.). We have already talked to her teacher about this suspected issue, but Lizard talked to her teacher about not wanting Kool-Aid and she brought her own organic-less-sugar-no food-dye juice. I am very proud of her.
And, after Little Man had his 3-year check up last week, I am wondering how much his diet is impacting his behavior. His doctor suggested some of his behaviors could become worrisome if they are not controlled within the next year. She did not indicate that she thought he might have ADHD or anything like that at this point. And after doing some research, I would be very surprised if that were the outcome (and very sad). But, I am beginning to wonder how much of his behavior is the “boy” in him and how much his behavior would improve with a better diet.
I have had many people…his doctor included…tell me repeatedly that Little Man is more “active” than most children at his age – boy or girl. That is helpful, but I often wonder if it is their polite way of saying “your kid is out of control.” I don’t think so, but in my exasperated state with him many times, I have to wonder. He is defiant, impulsive, destructive, loud and hurtful a lot of the time. On the flip side, he can sit and play cars, likes to look at books and watch a video. So he can settle down. And he is very smart, silly funny and the cutest 3 year old I know. But, my days are mostly filled with refeerring, disciplining and negotiating. Now, most would say that is what you do with a 3 year old. And, yes, I agree; but, not to this degree. I am truly worried about how he will do in preschool this fall.
I want so much for Little Man and all my kids succeed. What parent wants their kid to struggle? I want to make sure we have done everything we can to help ensure they are successful. So my research continues… family decisions regarding food choices and our budget are to be made… So, yes, it has been a long tough week on many fronts.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Ramblings of a "Would-Be" Fly
I often would like to be a fly on the wall of my friend’s homes. Not out of some crazy “I like to snoop” type thing. It is really just to see if I am a typical Mom in my daily struggles. I often feel like I am the only one who could possibly have such frustrations and annoyances. Now friends will commiserate with me about the struggles and frustrations with their kids or whatever. But, come on, do they really have it as bad as me? (I say that with sarcasm). Hence, the fly on the wall idea.
It would really be a good reality check for me. Little Man is mentally and physically exhausting most days. Lizard is snuggly happy one minute then screaming mad within the next nano-second. Soccer Girl is a tween with all the hormones starting to do their thing; really stuck in that middle ground of being a little girl and a teenager. How would my friends handle my daily messes?
I have the best kids in the world, a great marriage, we are healthy, and have food to eat and a roof over our heads. Why then, am I exasperated much of the day? I think part of is that parenting is much harder than I ever imagine…I regret lots of the choices I make as a Mom…I feel like an unappreciated maid many days…I miss time with just Chief…
We tell the kids often to choose differently so you get a different outcome. That is great advice to dish out, but much harder to follow myself. There are days when I can choose differently…change my tone of voice, give choices, spend the quality time I need to with my family. But then there are days that I am mentally “done” before I have even gone downstairs and bark orders like a drill sergeant.
I am in a season of mental “doneness” right now. Chief said to me last night that I don’t seem happy. Honestly, deep down I am happy. What appears as unhappiness is probably frustration, tiredness and an underlying feeling that the tough parenting falls to me most of the time. I get that this is the nature of my “job” to be home with the kids. It is a choice we have made and one I would not change. But, who knew it would be so much harder for me then going to a 9-5 traditional job every day.
I have sometimes rolled my eyes at the advice “take care of yourself first so you can take care of others.” I am finding some truth to that at this time of my life, especially today. I think I am going to have to reprioritize things and put myself near the top. If I continue down this path, it is going to get bumpy and ugly. I don’t want that and neither does my family.
So…if you see a fly on your wall that looks a bit like me, I am not snooping, really. I am just trying to make sure that I am okay.
It would really be a good reality check for me. Little Man is mentally and physically exhausting most days. Lizard is snuggly happy one minute then screaming mad within the next nano-second. Soccer Girl is a tween with all the hormones starting to do their thing; really stuck in that middle ground of being a little girl and a teenager. How would my friends handle my daily messes?
I have the best kids in the world, a great marriage, we are healthy, and have food to eat and a roof over our heads. Why then, am I exasperated much of the day? I think part of is that parenting is much harder than I ever imagine…I regret lots of the choices I make as a Mom…I feel like an unappreciated maid many days…I miss time with just Chief…
We tell the kids often to choose differently so you get a different outcome. That is great advice to dish out, but much harder to follow myself. There are days when I can choose differently…change my tone of voice, give choices, spend the quality time I need to with my family. But then there are days that I am mentally “done” before I have even gone downstairs and bark orders like a drill sergeant.
I am in a season of mental “doneness” right now. Chief said to me last night that I don’t seem happy. Honestly, deep down I am happy. What appears as unhappiness is probably frustration, tiredness and an underlying feeling that the tough parenting falls to me most of the time. I get that this is the nature of my “job” to be home with the kids. It is a choice we have made and one I would not change. But, who knew it would be so much harder for me then going to a 9-5 traditional job every day.
I have sometimes rolled my eyes at the advice “take care of yourself first so you can take care of others.” I am finding some truth to that at this time of my life, especially today. I think I am going to have to reprioritize things and put myself near the top. If I continue down this path, it is going to get bumpy and ugly. I don’t want that and neither does my family.
So…if you see a fly on your wall that looks a bit like me, I am not snooping, really. I am just trying to make sure that I am okay.
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